Posts Tagged ‘try this at home’

Taper- Resting Before A Competition For Peak Performance.

Monday, February 8th, 2010

Try This At Home………………………

Have your child hold her hands straight out to the side at shoulder height, like an airplane, for 30 seconds.  Depending on her age and ability you may need to make some adjustments by either decreasing or increasing the time or having her hold a water bottle in each hand for extra weight.  You want her to feel a little fatigue at the end of the 30 seconds, but most importantly, be successful in completing the task.  Afterward, tell her that this exercise is meant to show her what she can accomplish when she has allowed her body to rest before a performance.   

Next, have her hold her arms out first for 15 seconds, then 20 seconds and finally 25 seconds with a minute rest in-between.  After another minute or two of rest, have her hold her arms out for 30 seconds again, like she did in the first exercise.  Have her compare how she felt during the first 30 second exercise to the second time she did it.  Explain to her that  not allowing her body to rest and recover before a big competition can cause a less than optimal performance, just as it did in the second exercise. 

                                                  ***************************************************

Resting before a big competition or game is generally called a taper.  It is an extremely important part of achieving peak performance.  A complete taper is only done before the most important competitions.  A mini taper can be done before other competitions, but for some competitions your child may choose not to taper at all.  Your child needs to know what her ultimate goal is and understand that in order to be as prepared as possible, she may need to sacrifice by training through less important competitions.  In order to improve, she needs to increase her work load and intensity; if she is always tapering for relatively unimportant events, she won’t maximize her gains.

I found that racing unimportant races in a tired state was a great way to raise my game.  I am extremely competitive, so I always pushed myself harder in a race than I ever could train by myself, even when I was exhausted.

A mini taper generally ranges from a few days to a week.  During my career, my main goal each year was either the World Championships or the Olympics.  Therefore, before World Cups and important National selection races I only did a mini taper.  All of the coaches I worked with during my cycling career worked backward from my competition when they developed my taper. 

  • The day before my competition I did what we called,”openers”.  Openers were about half of a normal workout and focused on the heart rate zones and intensity I’d be using most in my race.  The purpose was to wake my body up and make sure it was ready to work hard again after several days of rest. 
  • Two days before my race I would go for an easy hour ride. 
  • Three days before my competition I would generally do an easy hour ride as well, but sometimes I would take completely off. 
  • Four and five days out I’d do a normal workout, but I would control myself and wouldn’t over do it.  If I did a second workout either day, it consisted of an easy half hour to hour ride.
  • Six days out I’d generally ride for an easy hour or two. 

A big taper can begin anywhere from a week to two weeks out from the competition. It follows the same structure as a mini taper, but is less dramatic further  from the competition.  In my regular training I generally trained three to four days in a row before taking an easy day.  Often I did two workouts a day.  For a big taper, two weeks out I’d decrease to one intense workout a day, and if there was a second workout it would just be an easy ride.  I’d also decrease the number of intense days between rest days, so instead of going three days before a rest day, I’d do two days or sometimes even one.

It is easy to think that more is better and that last minute cramming will pay off, but in general you child is better off going into her competition rested. That is a true statement for sports as well as other activities and academics.

Every athlete and every sport is different, but the principle is the same; peak performances come from rested athletes.  Decreasing her work load is the most import part of a taper, but making sure she is getting proper sleep and nutrition is also important.  She should know, that just because she has a rest day doesn’t mean she can go play Ultimate Frisbee with her friends, or spend hours on her feet shopping.  She truly needs to rest if she wants to perform at her best.  

For more information on myself or my children’s books please visit www.erinmirabella.com

  • Share/Bookmark

Goal Setting, Part 2

Monday, January 25th, 2010

 Try This At Home……………..

Next time your child fails at achieving her goal, have her make a list of everything that she did well and a list of all the things that did not go well.  Then have her analyze the second list and come up with ways to fix or improve upon them.   Once those things are fixed, have her try again.

                                                             *************************************************

We’ve all failed to accomplish a goal at one time or another.  It’s normal to feel lousy when it happens, but the more productive response would be to figure out why it happened.  Cavett Robert said, “Life is a grindstone, and whether it grinds you down or polishes you up, is for you and you alone to decide.”  You can let your failures control and define you, or you can learn from them and use them to your advantage.  The choice is yours.

Fear of failure was the thing that I struggled most with during my cycling career.  I was so afraid of not being perfect that I would agonize over the possibility of failure.  Like everything in life, the thing that you dwell on is what comes to be, and left unchecked my fear became a self fulfilling prophesy.  Fear of failure is a separate post all to itself, but I mention it because in learning to deal with my fear, I learned an important lesson about failure…….While failure is unpleasant, it doesn’t make you a failure and it isn’t the end of the world.  It’s simply a step toward becoming successful.  You won’t find a successful person out there who hasn’t failed a few times in the process. 
                                                           
We all want to protect our kids and hate to see them fail, but as I’ve said over and over again in my blog posts, your child will learn far more from failing than they will from success.  Sure, failure isn’t any fun, but it can teach a valuable lesson. 

                                                                                    Reasons Why We Fail

We Went About It Wrong

Most likely the reason your child failed is because she went about it the wrong way.  This is the most valuable lesson in failing.  If she can realize where she went wrong and fix it, then the next time she’ll be successful. Help her analyze the situation and figure how she can improve.  

Lack of Motivation/ Follow Through

If your child seems unmotivated to do what is necessary to accomplish her goal, then it might be time for her to access if the goal is still important to her.  Sometimes priorities change.  My husband quit his wrestling career in the middle of a tournament.  In the middle of a match, he decided it just wasn’t fun anymore.

The other option may be that she just doesn’t want to put in the work.  She wants the reward that comes with accomplishing her goal, but she isn’t willing to do what it takes to get there.  In the end if she fails at her goal because of her work ethic then she’ll learn an important life lesson.  Letting her learn this lesson the hard way, while she is young, is the best gift you can give her.

Lack of focus

Your child may fail to accomplish her goals, because she isn’t focused enough at the task at hand.  She needs to choose which goal is most important and give that the most attention.  She may not know how to focus.  Focusing is a learned thing and is something that is crucial to success in all aspects of life.  Check out my previous prioritization blog for tips on teaching your child to prioritize and stay tuned in a few weeks for my post on the art of focusing. 

Unrealistic Expectations

Your child’s goals may be unrealistic.  If she fails to meet her goal it’s a great opportunity for her to be completely honest about why it happened.  She may have inadvertently set herself up for failure by setting an unrealistic goal.  Help her learn to set realistic goals.  This doesn’t mean that she can’t dream big, it just means she has to be realistic about things like her timetable, talents, abilities, etc.  Some goals take a long time to reach, and some people are better suited at achieving some goals than others.  

If she has failed to reach her goal the first thing she should look at is her timetable.  Maybe her goal would be more achievable if she gave herself more time.  She may also need to add in some additional sub-goals.  Maybe her plan is missing a few steps.

The harder thing for her to do will be to access her abilities. She may find her talents lend themselves better to a new and different goal. She may find she has more to lose by continuing her pursuit than she does by throwing in the towel.  The choice is never an easy one, but this too is an important lesson to learn. 

Part of learning to set goals, is learning what to do when it doesn’t work out.  It is an important skill set for your child to develop.  Learning from their failure will make them successful.

For more information on myself or my children’s books please visit www.erinmirabella.com  My book, Gracie Goat’s Big Bike Race, is an excellent way to talk about overcoming fears with your child.

  • Share/Bookmark

Setting Goals

Monday, January 18th, 2010

Try This At Home……………………..

Using the steps below, have your child set a goal that he can accomplish in the next month or two.  (or less)

                                    ********************************************************

Did you set a new years resolution this year?  Did your kids?

This post may have been more appropriate as the first one of the New Year, but hopefully it’s still relevant because you are sticking to your resolution.  If you didn’t make a resolution, or you’ve already given up on your resolution, don’t lose heart, this is the perfect time to get back on track. 

A New Years resolution is just a fancy way to say you’re setting a goal for yourself.  Occasionally you’ll hear someone say they aren’t a goal oriented person, or they don’t really know how to set goals, but most likely these people are setting goals everyday.  Every time they make a to-do list, a honey do list, or leave the house expecting to arrive at a destination at a particular time, they’ve set a goal.  They just may not realize it. 

Your kids do the same thing.  They may not know the word goal, but they set goals for themselves all the time.  They may want to ride a bike like their big brother, own a certain toy or score a goal in their next soccer game.  When my son Micah was about a year and a half old, he wanted to jump so badly.  He would bend his knees, crouch way down and throw himself upward, but his cute, little, flat feet never left the ground.   Finally, with enough practice, he got some air.  I tell you this, because if a one year old can set a goal and find a way to accomplish it, anyone can.

It’s never too early to teach your child about setting goals.  Having goals will help him to be successful, give him a purpose, help him learn to manage his time and resources, and give him a sense of accomplishment. 

I’ve found that often people are good at setting goals; they just have no idea what to do after that.  Here are some basic things you can teach your child about achieving his goals.

Make a Goal

If your child doesn’t already have a goal, have him come up with one.  Like I said, he probably already has a goal; he just may not have defined it as such.  Have him write his goal down.  Explain the importance sharing his goal with another person, because they can help with accountability and problem solving.

Break It Down

Next, ask him how he thinks he can go about reaching his goal.  Let him come up with some ideas.  Some goals are simple, like I need to get a load of laundry done today. The only thing you have to decide in order to accomplish that, is when specifically you’re going to do it.  Other goals are more complex, like making an Olympic Team.  Goals like that are so lofty, that they need to be broken down into mini sub-goals.    The sub-goals work like stair steps. Each time you accomplish a sub-goal you move one step closer to the big one. I think most people fall short of their goals, because they fail at this step. 

Here is an example.

  1. Set a goal.
  •  Running a mile in ten minutes.

     2. Break it up into mini-goals. 

  • Buy running shoes
  • Find a place to run and measure off a mile using the car odometer. (Find land marks at the quarter mile markers as well.)
  • Run a quarter mile
  • Run a half mile
  • Run three quarters of a mile
  • Run 1 mile
  • Time yourself while you run 1 mile.
  • Run a mile is less than twelve minutes.
  • Run a mile is less than eleven minutes.
  • Run a mile in less than ten minutes.

Set A Deadline

On a calendar, have him write his final goal on a specific date and highlight it.  That is his deadline.  Then, have him work backward and figure out when each sub goal needs to be accomplished in order to accomplish his final goal by the deadline.  Have him identify the deadline for each sub goal on the calendar as well.

Developing a Plan

Now that he has a goal, and sub goals, he will need to decide what needs to happen in order to accomplish his first sub goal.  Maybe he needs to put some other activities on hold so he has more time to devote to his goal.  He may need to do some research, get more sleep, or set a specific time each day he will practice.  Have him write his plan down.

What You Can Do

Be interested.  Ask him how his plan is going and help him trouble shoot.

Celebrate

Don’t forget to celebrate the milestones.  It is easy to be so focused on the final goal that the accomplishment of each mini goal is over looked. Make sure to give him a hug, tell him he’s doing a great job and how impressed you are with his persistence and discipline.  There doesn’t have to be a reward for each mini goal.  The sense of accomplishment should be reward enough, especially if the end goal is one he really wants to reach.

Stay tuned next week for part two of goal setting.  For more information on myself or my children’s books, Gracie Goat’s Big Bike Race and Shawn Sheep The Soccer Star, please visit www.erinmirabella.com

  • Share/Bookmark

Warming Up

Monday, January 11th, 2010

I apologize again for not having a post for you last week. Thanks for checking back.

 Try This At Home…………………..

Take a frozen French toast stick and snap it in half. Tell your child that when she hasn’t warmed up before exercise, her muscles are cold, inflexible and less capable of working hard. Explain that exercising without warming up first, can cause injuries to muscles and tendons. Next, heat up a French toast stick in the microwave and show her that afterward it is supple and bends easily. Explain that just like the French toast stick, her muscles aren’t ready until they are warmed up. After a warm up, her muscles are lose, warm and ready to work hard. Note that a warm and bendy French toast stick doesn’t break, just like her muscles are less likely to be injured when they are warm.

                                                                                ********************************************************

Warming up is key to an optimum performance. If I jumped into a race or intense workout without warming up, my body revolted. I was miserable; I felt stiff, sluggish, extra sore and unresponsive. Plus, I was putting myself at a much higher risk of an injury. If you skip a workout you run the risk of being unprepared for an opportunity early on in your competition.

Everyone’s ideal warm up is a little different, but the concept is the same. A warm up is an easy exercise, like walking, jogging or jumping jacks, which increases blood flow to your muscles and slowly elevates your heart rate.

I personally found that I needed less of a warm up than some of my teammates. If I warmed up too much, then I was tired for my race. When I first moved to the Olympic Training Center they helped me develop a warm up program. I had always warmed up, but with their guidance I started using heart rate, and eventually wattage output, as a guide. Fundamentally there wasn’t anything wrong with the warm up I had been doing, it actually wasn’t much different from my new and improved one, but my new one was more specific and routine.

 At first, the warm up they prescribed was too much for me. The first time I tried it in its entirety was at my first World Cup in Italy. I followed my warm up as prescribed and I got to the start line feeling shaky. I still had a great ride, but I couldn’t help but wonder if I left some of it in warm up. Maybe it would have been an even better ride. My husband Chris helped me tone it down to a warm up that worked best for me. He pointed out that before my workouts; my warm up was much more concise. Generally my first effort of each workout was my best, so obviously a shorter warm up was enough.

Below is the warm up I did before races. I would ride easy for ten to fifteen minutes, depending on how I was feeling. Then I would ramp up from about 50-60% of my max heart rate to 70%. I’d hold it there for about three to five minutes and then I would increase it to 75-80% for another three or four minutes. Lastly, I ramp it up to about 90% for about thirty seconds to a minute. After that I would back off and ride easy for another five minutes or so until my heart rate had come back down. I’d get off the bike and stretch for a few minutes. Then I’d put my race gear on my bike and depending on my event that day, I’d do either several ten second sprints or one and a half kilometers at race pace. The first sprint usually felt pretty lousy but the second one was always much better. Afterward I would stay warm by riding easy for several minutes, off and on, until it was time to race. I liked to end my warm up about ten to fifteen minutes before my race. That allowed me time to get race gear on, use the bathroom, etc. More time wasn’t a bad thing as long as I could keep myself warm by riding easy.

 Here are some additional things to consider.

 In cold weather it is much harder to get warmed up and to stay warm.

In very hot weather you may have to warm up less and need to make sure you stay hydrated.

You need to be somewhat flexible. Murphy ’s Law says that if something can go wrong it will, so you have to expect that at least occasionally something is going to happen to throw a wrench in your plans. Your goal should be to get the perfect warm up before a competition, but prepare yourself to have to improvise.

 Help your child develop good warm up habits at a young age. Set a good example, and help her develop a routine that works for her.

For more information about myself or my children’s books, please visit www.erinmirabella.com

  • Share/Bookmark

Eating to maximize performance

Monday, December 14th, 2009

Try this at home…………..

Have your child keep a journal of what she eats for a week.  This isn’t meant to encourage her to go on a diet, only to make her more aware of what she is eating.  Encourage her to eat normally throughout the week; it isn’t a helpful exercise if she alters her eating habits because she is recording he food intake.  At the end of the week help her analyze her meals.  Stick to the basics, is she eating well rounded meals?  Is she getting enough fruits, vegetables, protein and dairy?  Are her pre and post workout meals the best choices for optimum performance?  This isn’t just about sports.  Eating good meals can help her focus better during tests as well.

Based on her journal have her pick two things to change.  Maybe she is going to incorporate a recovery drink into her post-workout routine, try to eat one more serving of fruits and vegetables every day, or eat more protein before she works out/competes/tests. (adding some veggies to a fruit smoothie is a great option for picky eaters.)

                    **********************************************

If it’s true that you are what you eat, then today I am a Christmas cookie, because I have had absolutely no will power. 

During my ten-year career as an elite athlete, I met athletes that ran the gamete from health nut to junk food junkie.  I tended to be right in the middle.  I ate well balanced meals, but since I have a major sweet tooth, I didn’t deny myself the occasional treat.  My philosophy is everything in moderation. If however, you and your family eat on the healthier end of the spectrum, keep it up.  Certainly making healthier choices is beneficial.

My husband, Chris, coached me from 2000-2006 and most of my education and direction on nutrition comes from him.  He is a chiropractor and certified strength and conditioning coach.  (And he thinks it’s fun to read all the latest research on nutrition and supplements.) Here are Chris’ top four eating musts for workouts, competition and exams. 

Top Four Eating Musts

1. Eat both protein and carbohydrates before workouts, competitions, and tests. Simple sugars, like cereal or pancakes, break down very quickly and the burst of energy they give you is generally short lived.  Protein, complex carbohydrates, like whole wheat foods and foods high in fiber, break down more slowly and give you longer lasting energy.  Here is an example of two of my favorite pre-race meals: Two eggs any style, whole wheat toast, yogurt and a banana.  Or, oatmeal mixed with a scoop of vanilla protein powder, a yogurt and banana. .  (Try to chose a yogurt higher in protein, like Stonyfield’s Oikos Greek yogurt.)

2. In the first thirty minutes after your workout or competition, have a recovery drink.  Recovery drinks get into you system quickly.  Timing of the drink is important for recovery, because in the first thirty minutes after exercise your body is driving nutrients into your muscles.  There are many different drink mixes out there; chose one that has simple sugars and fast absorbing protein, like whey.  A four to one ratio of carbohydrates to protein is ideal.  A good drink generally has about 200-400 calories.  Make sure to follow up your drink with a meal an hour or two later.  While not perfect, a cheap alternative to a recovery drink mix is chocolate milk.

3. Eat and drink often during exercise.  The general rule is, if you are hungry or  thirsty you waited too long.  Try to eat something, a energy gel for example, and drink a bottle of water or energy drink, every hour you exercise.  Believe me, bonking is miserable.  I’ve gotten to the point before, in both training and races, that my body just quit and I couldn’t think even coherently; I was pretty much useless.

4. Make sure you give your food enough time to digest before you exercise. Everyone is different, but I generally ate about two and half to three hours before I competed.  I found when I was nervous, my food digested slower and once I started warming up, my food didn’t digest at all.  All the blood went to my legs atnthat point.

Here are some additional tips.

Taking a multi-vitamin is a good idea when you are training hard, just to ensure you are getting all of the appropriate nutrients. 

Fish oil is a natural anti-inflammatory.  When I was training hard, my legs would throb every night.  I often couldn’t sleep, so I would take ibuprofen every night.  Once I started taking two fish oil every night, and morning, I needed ibuprofen much less often.  (If you find you are burping up the fish oil, they sell odorless fish oil capsules, which sometimes make the fish oil more manageable.  Or you can try just taking the fish oil at night.)

Both of my children’s books, Gracie Goat’s Big Bike Race and Shawn Sheep The Soccer Star, include a fitness fact.  One book’s fitness fact is on hydration and the other is on nutrition.  They are a great help in starting a discussion with your child on healthy eating and drinking habits.  Visit www.erinmirabella.com for more information.  For more information on my husband, Chris Mirabella, D.C. please visit www.tellercountychiropractic.com.

  • Share/Bookmark

Curing cockiness

Monday, December 7th, 2009

Try This At Home……………..

Cut decent size holes in the top of two identical, empty boxes.  (Tissue boxes would work well.) Leave the first box as is, and on the second, tape plastic wrap over the hole from the inside.  Have your child sit with the first box about an arms length in front of him.  Have him close his eyes.  When you say go, he should open his eyes and drop a ball into the box as fast as he can.  Make sure it’s something he can easily do.  Each time he gets a ball into the box he gets a skittle, or some other kind of treat. (Don’t let him eat it yet.) After he’s done it successfully 3 times, raise the stakes. Tell him that you are going to make it more exciting.  This time he has a choice.  Before he drops the ball again, he can chose to receive one skittle as before or go for all or nothing.  Make sure that if he chooses the later, he understands that if he misses getting the ball into the hole he loses all of his skittles, and if he makes it you’ll double his total number of skittles.  Most kids will chose to take the gamble, but if not that is ok.  You can still finish the game. After he closes his eyes, switch the boxes out.  When you say go, he will open his eyes and drop the ball in as before, but the plastic wrap will prevent the ball from falling in.  If he took the gamble take all of his skittles away and tell him that this exercise showed the potential danger of being over confident.  Explain that there is a fine line between having a healthy self-confidence and being cocky, and that the game was designed to show him what can happen if he’s too confident in his abilities.  If he took the gamble, ask him what he was thinking when he decided to go for all or nothing.  Address his answer and if he needs help articulating it, suggest the following as the reason. Maybe he was having a lot of success dropping the ball into the box and thought that the gamble was a sure thing.  Explain that at some point in life he will find that he is really good at something and he may start to feel that he can’t lose, just like he felt after successfully dropping the ball in the hole three times. Explain that failure often happens when one starts to be too confident in his own abilities. Oftentimes cockiness leads to carelessness or causes him to underestimate a task or opponent.  Explain that the last time he played the game, when the ball didn’t fall in the hole, was a simulation of that failure.  Then, since you tricked him, let him enjoy his skittles.

If he didn’t take the gamble, then he only missed out on one skittle, but you can still explain the games lesson to him as above.

                                ***********************************

Take the opportunity to discuss the following definitions with your child

Dictionary.com defines the following:

Humble:  not proud or arrogant; modest: to be humble although successful.

Self confident: realistic confidence in one’s own judgment, ability, power, etc.

Cocky: arrogant; pertly self-assertive; conceited: He walked in with a cocky air.

Having a realistic expectation and positive outlook of your abilities is a good thing.  Being confident in your abilities can make you very successful.  Everyone loves the successful, yet humble victor.  No one, on the other hand, is very fond of the cocky, obnoxious one. 
 
As I said, there is a very fine and sometimes gray line between a healthy self-confidence and over-confidence.

I like to think of it like this.  Self-confidence is just that, for self.  Understanding and being confident in your abilities will allow you to perform at your very best and accomplish peak performances in whatever you are doing.  To me, self-confidence has nothing to do with anyone else.  It shouldn’t mean you think your better than others, it should just be a realistic measure of what you are capable of. 

Here’s something that may help your child put things in perspective. In the end, no one really cares besides him and the people who love him. Ask him who won their specific event last year? Ask him who won it in the Olympics 8 years ago, or equivalent event? There is a good chance that he doesn’t know. People may remember successes for a short time, but in the end they forget, and the only one who still remembers is the actual winner.
 
Being over confident means you have lost sight of reality and have an inflated opinion of yourself.  It’s when you have started to think you are better than other’s because of your success.  One thing I’ve learned is that no matter how good you think you are, there is always someone better.  You just may not have met them yet.  You will get beat; it’s just a matter of time.  From my experience, the cockier someone is, the harder they fall. 

If your child is struggling with too much confidence/cockiness, the best medicine is losing.  If your child is in a league that is way below his level and his success is starting to go to his head, then maybe it’s time to move him up to the next level.  Winning is a good thing and a great self-confidence booster, but as I’ve said in previous blogs, no one learns nearly as much from winning as they do from losing.  Ironically, the way to make your child better, is for them to occasionally lose.  It keeps their ego in check and helps them raise their game.

Here are some other things to think about.

Do you want your child to receive a trophy regardless of whether on not they win or lose?

Do you gush over everything your child does, even if it isn’t worthy of it?

Are you setting a good example when it comes to being humble?  Are the coaches?

Is your child’s assessment of his ability realistic?  Is yours?

In an attempt to be humble, do you forget to praise your child for his accomplishments?

Having a humble spirit and heart is not an easy thing, especially following success.  While I am far from perfect at it, it is something I strive for. You will hopefully find your own solution; I find mine in my faith.  I believe that all of my talents are God given.  Therefore all of my success is God given and all I’m doing is attempting to maximize what God gave me.  I’ve found that for me, there is nothing more humbling than thinking about the sacrifice Jesus made for me on the cross and God’s grace for me when I fall on my face. 

My children’s book, Shawn Sheep The Soccer Star, is great for starting a conversation with your child about cockiness.  For more information or to purchase a book, please visit www.erinmirabella.com.

  • Share/Bookmark

Raising Confident Kids

Monday, November 30th, 2009

Try This At Home………………

Take a glass jar and at least thirty colored strips of paper.  On each strip of paper have your child write down one thing that he or she likes about his or herself or does well.  Fill the jar with the strips and have them put the jar someplace they will see it everyday.  The next time your child is feeling down or is lacking confidence, have he or she read through all of the papers in the jar and remember how blessed and loved he or she is.  You can always have your child add five or ten more strips to the jar for good measure.

                         ***************************************

I recently spoke to a group of moms with children ages 0-5, about how sports can facilitate teaching their children the fundamentals for success.  One of the discussion questions afterward asked if there was a related issue that their child was struggling with.  Two of the moms said their child lacked self-confidence and one said her son was over confident.  This caught me off guard; I hadn’t expected children to be struggling with confidence at such a young age.  It reaffirmed for me what an important topic confidence was and how vital a healthy self-confidence is to a child’s happiness and well-being. 

This post is going to focus on lack of self-confidence and I’ll tackle the issue of being over-confident next week. 

Sports, or any activity that your child loves, are a great opportunity to increase confidence.  The most important thing, is to help your child find a sport, or activity, that he or she loves and can excel at.  Your child’s success will help them gain confidence in his or herself and abilities.

In addition, being in sports, especially team sports, makes it easier for kids to meet people and make friends.  Two of the biggest concerns for children and adults alike are being accepted and worrying what people think of them. In sports your child already shares something in common with his or her teammates and that makes developing a friendship that much easier.  Furthermore, sports offer the opportunity to develop social skills such as teamwork, tact, cooperation and compassion.  

We all worry about what we look like. For tweens and teens their changing bodies can be a confusing and sensitive subject.  An added bonus of sports is that they make kids more aware of, and in tune with, their bodies.  Athletes tend to be very comfortable with their bodies and have a more realistic expectation of what their bodies should look like.  They can compare themselves to other athletes instead of the models they see in magazines, and they’ll understand that bodies can be used for more than just looking good. 

Another added benefit is that self-confident kids are less likely to fold to peer pressure, more willing to try new things and probably more successful, because they believe they will succeed.

There are two steps to gaining confidence, building it up and maintaining it.  Sometimes an incident can get in your head and mess with your confidence forever.  It’s happened to all of us and years later we are still haunted by it.  That’s why it is so important for your child to get back up on the horse after a fall, so to speak.  While my husband Chris and I were discussing this week’s post, he pointed out that in the NFL, teams often give the ball back to a player immediately after they fumble or miss a catch, in order to rebuild their confidence right away.  The longer your child has to think about a mistake before he or she performs again, the more it can shake his or her confidence. It is better to address it as soon as possible.

Lastly, whether it is in sports, school, or in daily chores around the house, celebrate your child’s accomplishments big and small.  You don’t have to compliment him or her for the sake of it, but when they have earned it, go ahead and give it.  A compliment coming from you will mean so much to your child and will build his or her confidence immensely. Sometimes it’s easy to take accomplishments for granted, or to brag to your friends but forget to tell your child how proud of him or her you are.  Your child wants to please and impress you, and you can use that to help build his or her self-confidence by praising them.

I won my first senior national points race championship when I was 20 years old.  I had one of the greatest races of my life.  I raced hard and finished the race absolutely exhausted.  By the time I recovered, I was whisked away to awards, drug testing, etc., etc.  Afterward, my very proud boyfriend, the one I married, commented that I hadn’t even seemed to enjoy it, and I didn’t even take a moment to celebrate with him.  I realized he was right.  I was so busy doing what I was supposed to, what was expected of me and focusing on what was next, that I forgot to enjoy it.  If the person winning can forget to celebrate, then it has to be even easier for parents and others to forget to share how proud they are of their child.

Confidence is a fragile thing.  Help your child build it and nourish it, so that he or she can enjoy success of all kinds. 

In my children’s book, Gracie Goat’s Big Bike Race, Gracie struggles with confidence and fears.  the book is a great way to start a conversation with your kiddo about these important things.

  • Share/Bookmark

Raise your child’s game through competition and modeling.

Monday, November 23rd, 2009

Try This At Home……………………………

Here is a great way to help you child improve in a sport or activity that he or she is already interested in and good at.  Find out who is the most celebrated person in that sport or activity and do some serious research on them. (Research them on the Internet, watch videos of them, etc.) Analyze the specific things that make that person successful and encourage your child to emulate and model them.  Have your child work on improving those characteristics or skills you identified.

Next, find someone locally who is just a little better than you child and, if possible, have your child practice with him or her on a weekly basis.  Encourage your child to learn from them.  Monitor the situation to make sure you child is having fun and isn’t getting frustrated.

                         ******************************************

Competition makes you better.  If your child is always the best player on the team or in his or her league, then they aren’t being challenged and pushed to improve. If at all possible, find someone for you child to train with who can push and challenge them.  This will prevent their progress from becoming stagnant. Without competition your child ends up a big fish in a small pond. Later, it’s hard to move from the pond, where he or she is the star and accustomed to winning, to the lake or ocean, where he or she is just a little fish and won’t necessarily find success immediately.  (It’s not a bad idea to get a realistic idea of what you child can expect when they bump up to the next level, but I’ll save the details of that for another post.)

My first year training at the Olympic Training Center was a gradual immersion into the world of elite international racing.   My second year however, felt more like getting thrown into the deep end of a pool to see if I’d sink or swim.  Thankfully I didn’t sink, but that was in large part because I was training with stronger, more experienced women.  They pushed me every day, physically and mentally, and their presence both encouraged and forced me to raise my game if I wanted to succeed.

I vividly remember a training day at a World Cup selection track camp in Plano, Texas. Nicole Reinhart*, Karen Dunn and I were all vying for a spot in the points race at the upcoming World Cup, and each work out was considered by the coaches in selection. This particular work out was on the velodrome (a cycling track.) Our coach was driving the motorcycle and we were taking turns coming around the motor and leading out sprints to the finish line.  The goal was to win the sprint.  Karen and Nicole were much more experienced than me.  For the first few sprints my timing was all off; I would either go hard too soon, or I would kick too late.  I’ve very competitive, but instead of getting frustrated I tried to figure out what the other girls were doing that I wasn’t.  We were rotating through and taking turns leading out the sprints, so every third sprint I had an opportunity to watch them from behind.  I noted how they made their moves, when they made their moves, and how successful they were at it. I started copying their successes and by the end of the workout I was winning sprints. 

That year I trained with, lived with, and vied for spots against those same women, over and over again.  As difficult and stressful as it was at the time, it was probably one of the best things that could have happened to me, because I never became complacent and improved immensely.

Later on in my career I didn’t have that same benefit.  I found that training with guys was another way to raise my game.  This is one advantage women have over men, women always have the opportunity to train or practice against someone stronger and faster than them, because they can train with the men. 

I am grateful that I learned this lesson early on in my career. If you child has aspirations to make it to the next level, then he or she needs to constantly be looking for ways to improve.  Training with and modeling after people who are better are great ways to do that. Just like in a free market, we all benefit from healthy competition.

* Nicole Reinhart was a fantastic road sprinter, fierce competitor, a good, kind person, and someone I looked up to and admired. Her life was tragically cut short in a cycling accident during a race on September 17, 2000.  I’d like to dedicate today’s blog to her memory and encourage you to visit www.nicolefund.org for more information about her.

For more information about me or my children’s books, please visit www.erinmirabella.com.

  • Share/Bookmark

Creating a pre-competition routine.

Monday, November 16th, 2009

Try This At Home……………………….

Sit down with your child and write out his or her pre-performance routine.  See below for details. 

                     **********************************************

Before I get into developing a pre-competition routine, I want to address one thing I forgot to mention in last weeks post.  Both your child’s expectations and the expectations they feel you have for them, can add to their nervousness.  Whether they finish first or last, their best is all you can ask of them, and all they can ask of themselves.  Focusing on doing my best versus winning always helped me stay calm. 

Now, for today’s post.

When I moved to the Olympic Training Center I was immersed into USA Cycling’s endurance track program.  They stressed the importance of a pre-competition routine and helped me develop mine, step by step.  For me, developing a pre-competition routine was a defining moment in raising my game to the next level.  It helped me focus, prepare and keep my nerves under control.

A pre-competition routine is a step-by-step procedure that, if followed, ensures proper preparation allowing for an optimum performance. 

Below is a general outline to develop your child’s pre-competition routine.  You may need to tweak it for your child’s specific needs. He or she can use this technique for sports, tests, and pretty much any other activity that requires peak performance.

 1. Start by working backward from the start time of the competition.

 2. The last five minutes before the competition should be used for collecting thoughts, taking a few deep breathes and putting on gear, if it isn’t already on.

 3. Approximately 35-50 minutes before the start of the competition your child should begin warming up.  Types of warm-ups are unique to each sport.  Warming up is a completely separate post, but in general a warm up should start out easy and progress in intensity.  Go a step further than just saying that this time is set aside for warm up; have your child write down, minute by minute, the type of activities he or she will do and the intensity at which each will be done.  Remember that every athlete is different.  Have your child experiment to see what combination of warm-ups works best for him or her. Once you child finds their perfect warm-up recipe, write it down and stick with it.  I know many teams warm up together.  If that is the case, have your child join the team in warm ups.  If needed, he or she can add on additional exercises before or after the team warm up, or your child can talk to the coach about incorporating these additional activities into the team warm-up.

4. Now that you know when your child’s warm-up will start, you can help him or her calculate how much earlier to arrive at the field of play.  Account for things like equipment prep, pinning numbers, team meetings, and extra trips to the bathroom. 

5. If at all possible, have your child pack his or her sports bag the night before the competition.  If the sport requires a lot of equipment create a checklist so your child doesn’t forget anything important. Do as much prep work as possible before you get to the venue, (i.e. pin numbers, fill water bottles, prepare food, etc.)

6.  Lastly, create a music list on an iPod, MP3 player or CD that gets your child pumped up, focused and ready to compete. Have them listen to it while they are preparing to perform. (Where reasonable and safe.)   In addition to pumping them up, it will help them tune out unnecessary distractions and having ear phones in their ears will help keep people from interrupting their routine.

Here is an example of my pre-competition routine. The night before I tried, if at all possible, to get a least 8 hours of sleep.  I ate approximately two and a half to three hours before my race.  I arrived for my race an hour and a half before I was to compete.  I checked on my equipment and made sure that the appropriate gear was on my bike.  I laid out my helmet, shoe covers, gloves, cliff bar gel, etc.  I went to the bathroom and then climbed on my bike, with my music, to warm up.  I rode easy for 15 minutes.  Next, I got off my bike and stretched for 10-15 minutes.  Then I got back on the bike and did approximately a 10-minute wind up with the last 4 or 5 minutes at my threshold (Time trail pace.)  I ramped up my intensity by changing my gear to race gear and completing several 15-second sprints.  I then took one last trip to the bathroom, ate my gel, and finished with 5- 15 minutes of easy riding to stay warm.  During my warm-up I visualized myself doing my races perfectly.

Having a pre-competition routine will give your child security, confidence, and ensure that they do everything necessary to prepare for their event.  

For more information about me and my children’s books, please visit www.erinmirabella.com

  • Share/Bookmark

Help your child combat nerves.

Monday, November 9th, 2009

Try This At Home……………….

Have your child make a list of the ingredients that make up his or her perfect performance, whether it is for sports, school, or something else.  For example, do they need to be aggressive, patient, calm, thorough, go harder on a certain cue, watch for a certain tactic, etc.  Once he or she has written it down, have them close their eyes and visualize having the perfect performance, by doing all of the things on the list. Have your child visualize this daily.  Next time he or she starts to get nervous, pull out the list and have them focus on the specific things he or she needs to do to be successful. Your child’s pre-performance routine is also important.   I’ll discuss that in next week’s blog.

                       ***********************************************

Are you one of those people like me, who gets nervous before competition, or are you more like my husband, Chris, who hardly gets nervous at all?  How about your kids?

If your kids get very nervous before their performance, they may not be competing at their best and worst-case scenario may develop an aversion to competing.   Pre-competition jitters are good to a point, but past that they become detrimental. Help your child deal with extreme nervousness, by discovering the root of the problem and teaching them tactics for combating their nerves.

During my cycling career I got extremely nervous before races.  The more important a race was to me, the more nervous I got.  Since track racing was my main focus, I was painfully nervous before every race.  Once I started racing I was fine, but it was not uncommon for me to make myself ill to the point of puking before a race.  The question always became, whether or not I could control my nerves enough to prevent them from negatively affecting my racing. Even through I loved track racing, I started enjoying road racing more, simply because I didn’t get as nervous for it. Thankfully I learned some tactics to combat my nerves, but it was still something that I struggled with at every race. 

One of my motivations for doing this weekly blog is to help the next generation overcome some of the detrimental hang-ups that I watched myself and other Olympians battle with during our careers.  Each of us had our own personal nemesis that, left unchecked, inhibited us from reaching our full potential.  A lot of the reason I would get so nervous was due to my nemeses, my unrealistically high expectations and fear of failure.  These are topics for their own blog posts, but I mention them because I think it’s important to get to the root of the problem.  You and your children might have different reasons for being nervous, but no matter the cause, here are some things that I found that helped me. 

I tried not to think; it was my worst enemy.  I have an overactive imagination and the what-ifs always got me.  One of the reason’s I trained so hard, was so that when race time came instinct would kick in.  If I could turn my brain off and go on autopilot, my body would take over and do what it did every day in training. I knew if I could just get to the start line with out psyching myself out, I’d be fine.

The what-ifs can be motivating for some, but for me they became all consuming.  I knew that in order to be successful at racing, I had to stop thinking about the end result and focus on the things I had to do  in order to be successful.  So, Instead of thinking about winning or losing, I focused on things like my pre-race routine, my aggressiveness and pack positioning during the race. (For those readers who aren’t cyclists, a group of cyclists is called a pack.)  Since in the end I couldn’t control what my competition did or didn’t do, I tried to stop worry about them and focus on what I could control.  If I focused on the small picture things, I found the big picture took care of itself.

Lastly, and this was something I was crummy at remembering, our past does not have to be indicative of our future.  Each new competition is just that, new.  It is a fresh start, and while it’s important to learn from our past mistakes they don’t need to define us.  In addition, Remind them  to have some fun.

Hopefully these will give you a starting point when it comes to fighting nerves. If you have any tactics that help you, please share them.

My children’s book, Gracie Goat’s Bike Race, addresses Gracie’s fears and anxiety’s.  It is a great book to read to kids who are nervous because they are worried about all of the what-ifs.  For more information on Gracie please visit www.erinmirabella.com.

  • Share/Bookmark